Years ago being gay meant that no matter how much you wanted a child, it just wasn’t possible. However, nowadays things are different and many gay men and women are bringing up, happy healthy children.
There are a number of ways gay people can become parents:
The 2013 Every child Deserves a Family Act has been introduced to congress and it states that any organisation which handles foster care and adoptions and receives funds from the Federal Government cannot discriminate against same sex couples. Unfortunately, it doesn’t apply to private organisations, but adoption is now legal in around 50 states.
Each State has its own rules and regulation regarding adoption, for example, some insist that a couple are married and some say the married couple must have been married for at least a year. However, the rules are changing all the time, so if you are interested in foster care or adoption then it is important that you get help and up to date information from an organisation or a lawyer who specialises in adoption cases for the Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual or transgender community.
Gay men, couples and individual can make use of a surrogate to help them become a parent. A surrogate is a woman who will carry a child to term and then hand the baby over to the parents when the baby is born. Surrogacy can be expensive, although some women are happy to do it for expenses only.
Surrogates can be found through surrogate agencies, online or through friends and family. For a gay man, it means that he has a child that biologically belongs to him.
Female gay couples, or straight single women can use donor insemination to become pregnant and have a child. The baby will be biologically attached to the mother, although he or she may never know her father.
Donor insemination can be done at a fertility clinic, where you will be given information such as the height of the donor, his eye and hair colour and his education. All sperm donors from clinics will have had to fill out a lengthy questionnaire. They are also given certain health checks and have their sperm analysed for quality and quantity. You can also buy sperm from a clinic and have it delivered frozen to your home.
If you prefer to know who the father of your child is going to be, then use an online website which specialises in getting men and women together. There are a large number of men willing to donate sperm, for a fee or free of charge and this method gives you the chance to get to know the person before you commit to sperm donation.
Using the internet also means that you can make the choice of artificial insemination, which is normally carried out using the turkey baster method, or, you can have sex with your donor and conceive naturally.
Co-parenting is when two people who aren’t in a relationship get together to become parents. They both share the responsibilities and financial side of bringing up the child.
Co-Parenting, is ideal for gay men, who don’t have a partner, or who have a partner who doesn’t want children, straight single women or lesbian couples. Many straight single women and lesbian couples welcome the fact that their child will have a father that’s involved and of course sharing the finances is a great benefit.
Have a look at the adverts on Co-parenting websites. Get to know a few prospective co-parents and pick the one that has a similar outlook on child rearing to yourself. Take time to get to know the person, this is important because they are going to be part of your life for a very long time.