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Advice required: sperm donation or coparent
I have a huge decision to make and I wondered if anyone can offer advice or other perspectives. I am a 39 yr old single female who would love to try to have a child. I have two options – enter into a coparent relationship with my gay best friend or use a sperm donor.
1) Coparenting – my friend and I have been friends for 25 years and have talked about having a baby extensively. He is keen to have a child and is in a very stable, long term relationship and owns his own company so is the ‘perfect’ coparent. If I agreed to this I would have to move from Sydney back to the UK (I moved to Australia 2 years ago). Although I think this would be a good option for the child (knowing who their father is and having 2 loving parents, even though we don’t live together). My concern is whether I would be restricting myself in the medium/long term as I would be ‘tied’ to Cardiff, Wales. I am quite an independant person and might find this a challenge (especially if I meet a partner in the future). On a positive note I have some very close friends who live in Cardiff and my parents/brother live a few hours away.
2) Sperm donation – I can use a sperm donor and raise the child on my own. I am financially secure and my sister who is having a baby lives in Sydney and has offered to be a big support. I realise that raising a child on my own is a huge undertaking and I worry about the child not knowing who the father is. I will know the donor (so the child can find out more information when they turn 18) but I am not sure if this is enough.
I am interested in hearing other peoples advice/thoughts as I want to make sure that I consider everything very carefully. Many thanks….
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1 Reply
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Question to your question…
You moved to Australia for a reason basically leaving your past behind while still keeping some ties to it. Does that reason still apply?
Can you really go back home to live for the rest of your life knowing you made your life currently in Australia? Would you end up resenting going back home restricting yourself for a joyous blessful reason when you could have done the same thing and still stay in Australia or where-ever else you decide as you please.
Something tells me Australia is your home now.
Have your child with a regular sperm donor and let your friend have a surrogate have his. :ugeek:
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