Support for Prospective Co-parent

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by cvcv00 » 17 Jan 2018


I am a gay male who is seeking to become a father and co-parent with a woman who shares similar values to me. I wanted to write to everyone to ask how those of you who have been successful with the co-parenting process managed to find support. I feel I have certain doubts and concerns, and I definitely don't have the sense of comfort with my family to tell them my plans to co-parent with a woman. My closest friends are supportive, but they really don't know what to say and can't help me in any way because they have no information about this. I've seen some negative opinions about this approach to parenting, which honestly surprised me. It also makes me uneasy to not be able to talk openly with my parents about parenthood. I feel my family would think I wasn't thinking things through or that it is a questionable course of action to take. I don't really know when a person is supposed to feel 100% ready to be a parent. What I do know is that I want a child so that I can hopefully help them grow into a great adult, and I want to do that with the help of a woman who can be a mother and co-parent. I'd like some insight and opinions. This certainly makes me nervous because to me finding a parent feels so much more significant than online dating for love. I have some questions below, please feel free to respond to any or all. It would help me a lot

1) How supported did you feel by your family, friends, local community before and while co-parenting?
2) How did your family respond/feel? Did their perspective or attitudes change afterwards?
3) How were you able to find a co-parent that was "the one"?
4) What concerns did you have and how did you handle them?
5) Were you able to speak to your co-parent about your flaws and hang-ups openly? (I am definitely not perfect and would want to be honest but I feel it could make finding someone harder?? Or is it easier??)
6) How many potential co-parents did you speak to or meet up with before finding your true co-parenting match?

Thank so much everyone

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