donor and is asking for AI not the norm

When you want a baby, sometimes there are no other options than going the "sperm donors way". By law, sperm donors in Australia must provide identifying information. So intended parents who want a baby through donor conception can look for sperm donors in a sperm bank.

by Hobbit » 01 Nov 2013

Looking for donors and perhaps silly of me, presumed donors would be aware that sex was not necessarily on the cards. I want to her from donors or others about what they think is reasonable to ask of a donor and is asking for AI not the norm?

by John09 » 08 Nov 2013

AI is "Best" for many reasons. BUT it is horses for courses. Some women want NI(Sex) about 1-5% from my reading of requests for sperm. Some men want NI and NO AI. Some men don't care either way, as long as it is the mother's choice. Some only want AI as that simplified the spiritual, medical, legal, relationship and respect issues. Lesbians and partnered straight women have a partner to consider as well. Bi and single women have less incentive to demand AI.
Some donors will "Bait and switch" agreeing to AI but when the time comes for donation pressure the women for the "Better" method of NI. Some donors also charge big money for sperm.
IF you want my 20 + reasons why I don't do NI ask me.
I have made 15 beautiful children (+2 current pregnancies) with AI and my treating the mothers with respect has made me good friends. :D

by John09 » 08 Nov 2013

Your question about "what is reasonable to ask from donors".
There are many questions you need to ask all prospective donors:
1) What is the contents of his sperm like =the DNA? Sperm banks issue donors with a genetic check list to eliminate problem genes in his ancestors, siblings, close family like cousins and decendants. If he has kids can you see photos and talk to the mothers. I try and link the applicants with satisfied mums so they know what my genes look like.
2) Do his sperm deliver the DNA? Will his DNA carriers do their job and find&ferterlise your egg? Successful donors are one avenue and virgin donors should show a Sperm analysis (Volume, Number/ml, Morphology and Motility).
3) Only sperm and no NASTIES? (HIV, Syph, Gon, Hep & Clamydia to name the worst). I am a regular blood (Plasma) donor so the Red Cross test me fortnightly for STDs. He should be able to show you a recent STD result. Time frame is not so critical for AI donors but for NI donors it is a must.
4) His relationship with you and your kids? Do you want to A) co-parent and share the costs and the wear and maintain your career or perhaps have 4 kids with his contribution. B) Known Donor where he is known to your kids and has an uncle/grandfather role in their lives (essential if you and your partner want more than one child with the same DNA. C) Unknown donor if you want to fuck your kids lives up.
5) Consanguinity? Do you want your daughters not to marry their brothers. If you only have one or two children and your donor has 20+ other kids do you want your kids to know and to have a relationship with their 1/2 siblings? Some women don't want "Serial donors" but virgins. If so marry them or co-parento them. But you have NO right to deny him what he is generously giving you for free. :D

by Babyhope » 21 Dec 2015

Hi john09, can I ask where you are located and if interested to be our sperm donor? We are based in Melbourne. Thank you.

by tash1988 » 29 Apr 2018

Hey there, i now this was posted ages ago but are your still interested in donating?
my/our names are Tash and Jill and i have been engaged to my beautiful fiance Jill for 5 (nearly 6 years now.)
we were looking at adoption but the process is so long (not that we wont try it in the future) and IVF will have 3 years (if we are approved and we would like to know who the father is (even if he wants to remain absent from their lives.)
we are a very easy going couple and financially stable to raise a child... that is so desperately wanted!!
we live south of the river (perth) and I work as a nurse what my fiance is a physio (but studying to be a Pharmacy/ Chemistry.)
yes we are a same sex couple... but we have been together since 2011, have built our own house together and are ready for our first child.
we have tried before with a friend 2 years ago but we were unfortunately unsuccessful.
Jill is light skinned, blonde hair and blue eyes while i am olive skin, dark hair and deep brown eyes. ideally we would like to find a close match to myself but it doesnt matter, I am just looking for a good block with a god personality
Now our little rules:
ARTIFICIAL INSEMINATION ONLY
NO INTERCOURSE OR SEX
DONATION ONLY FOR AI
IT WOULD BE WONDERFUL IF YOU WOULD CONSIDER DONATING AGAIN IN THE FUTURE SO OUR TWO CHILDREN CAN HAVE THE SAME FATHER,
We are happy to get a contract drawn up (like with did with our friend for piece of mind) if you are worried about money etc but we can give you our word the child will be ours and we will support him/ her 100% - we are able and capable too- we built our house 18 months with the intention of raising and bring up our children up in it, there are fantastic schools close by and all amenities.
I come from a big extended family who are very supportive of Jill and I and wish they could do something to help us in finding a sperm donor. Jill is an only child but has a supportive mum and we have a great bunch of friends,
we could like to find someone who is also willing to give us a sibling when the time comes as we want our children to have each other as then they have something in common and i believe it will make it easier on our (hopefully soon to be!) kids.
please help me fulfil my dream, i was born to be a mum and im ready to get started after a clean bill from the doctor.
p.s. we are both turning 30 - me on FRIDAY! -so my biological clock is ticking hahaha
But its not that, we have wanted this for so long and believe we will make fantastic parents and are flexible if you DID want to see the child, we would just need a contract drawn to say we dont want any money or compensation from you and in return you cannot apply for custody of our child once he/ she is born... hope that doesnt sound harsh but u know what i mean yeah?
I hear so many stories about woman on this website so im a little apprehensive being so open and honest, but thats just me and i ca just hope in my heart u are a genuine person!
Please help us!
Tash and Jill
xx

by Indiigo » 19 May 2018

John09,
If in 2013 you have already had 15 children (and 2 pregnancies on the way) can I ask you to please STOP?
I assume you have the best intentions but you are not a tom cat.
Being err, over prolific with your generosity greatly increases the chances of your children meeting and mixing down the track.




Return to CoParents and Sperm Donors in Australia

Are you looking for a Sperm Donor or Co-Parenting?

REGISTER NOW