Why Do People Want to Have Children?

By Last Updated: 03/21/2023

‘Why do people have kids?’ is a commonly asked question. Of course, you could always argue that the need to procreate and perpetuate the human species is simply instinctive. You could also say that we reproduce because this is just what people have done since the beginning of time.

However, it’s actually a bit more complex than that. We don’t make kids simply because our parents and grandparents did so, or because we are in a relationship and this is just what couples do. In fact, today, more and more people are making the decision to be childless, whether it’s because they prefer to remain independent, because raising a child is too expensive and involves taking on too much responsibility or because they think that there are already too many people in the world.

For those who do want to start their family though, what is it that makes them want to have kids? What motivates them to take such an important decision? Read on to find out 10 common reasons for people to have children.

 

cute baby fluffy hair pretty boy

 

To render life happier and more beautiful

Whether they dream of a house full of children or just want the one child, people choose to have kids because they want to create a family that’s filled with love and joy. Cuddling, seeing your little one growing up happy and healthy, smiling at you, laughing, playing and giving affection makes your life happier every day.

To transmit values and carry on the family line

Having kids is also a way to transmit important values, as well as family history and experience. Becoming a mother or a father is also a chance to carry on the family name, whether you have a child on your own or with your partner.

To make the world a better place

Many people who read or watch the news feel that the world is violent and scary. Although some people decide to remain childless for this reason, others wish to make the world a better place by raising kind and respectful children with values they hold dear. In this sense, kids represent hope for the future, a new generation that cares deeply about others and their environment.

To give life meaning

Your life changes completely when you have kids. These changes don’t only concern your daily routine though. It’s also about the way you perceive the world. Now that you’re a parent, you have the most important reason to wake up, go to work and stay healthy every single day. Children give sense to life and make it (even more) worth living.

To give love and be loved

When parents are asked why they decided to have kids, many of them say it’s because they wanted to give their love and affection to a child. In return, the little one they raise will love them more than anything else in the world. A truly wonderful equation.

To build something amazing with their significant other

Creating a family with the person you love the most in the world is a powerful, instinctive desire. Your children are the result of the love you feel for each other, whether you conceive naturally or via a fertility treatment. Your child is a mini version of your partner and yourself.

Some will perhaps say that they decided to have a baby in order to make their partner happy, which, in the end, filled them with joy too. Others choose to build a family to reinforce the bonds of their relationship and to feel closer to their significant other.

To feel complete

Some women and men feel complete when they become a father or mother. They have become more mature by taking care of another person who needs them for absolutely everything. They now have new responsibilities. They are in charge of a little being that they are intensely proud of. It’s not just about themselves anymore. They have taken the place of their own mom and dad – they are the parents now.

To fix the mistakes of our parents

Sometimes, having a child comes from the will to do better than our parents, or to give to our children something that we couldn’t have ourselves. Those who were raised by neglectful parents, or those who didn’t have a mother or a father, may wish in some way to “repair” their wounds, by bringing a new life into the world. People may want to create a family so that their kids can have or accomplish the things that they couldn’t during their own childhood.

To live a new and challenging experience

Deciding to bring a new life into this world can be a terrifying (but exciting!) experience. The decision to become a parent can be motivated by the desire to try something different and to bring a new dimension to your life. Parents-to-be may want to challenge themselves and perhaps discover new parts of their personality that they did not know existed. Having children brings you to a whole new level that has the potential to change almost everything.

To relive your childhood

We can all get nostalgic from time to time. If you had a wonderful childhood, it’s only normal to want to relive these enchanted moments. When you’re a mom or a dad, it can be such a pleasure to watch your little ones play and to play along with them. You can see the world through their innocent eyes. On top of that, they are fun and make you laugh all the time. Becoming a parent gives you the opportunity to get in touch with your inner child all over again!

And you, what are your reasons for having a child?

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6 Comments

  1. Joseph 01/01/2023 at - Reply

    Ultimately, the decision is either thoughtless or selfish:
    A) everybody else does it
    B) I’ve run out of things to talk about with my spouse, so we had kids
    C) What do I talk about with my neighbors if I don’t have kids?
    D) I can live vicariously: “my little Johnny is sooo smart”
    E) who will look after me when I’m old and frail?
    F) if I didn’t have kids, I’d have to think about deep, existential issues — which make me anxious
    G) who will remember me when I’m dead if I don’t have kids.
    H) I’m bored—nothing else to do
    I) I can dress up the little kid, and laugh when they do stupid things. Like having a puppy

    When people say they want children, they mean cute little toddlers. It’s funny how you don’t hear people say, “I can’t wait to have a lazy,
    Acne-covered fifteen year old, who swears at me, who rarely bathes, and who masturbates all day.”

    C’mon people: let’s be honest about this vitally important decision.

    • Soulake 05/04/2023 at - Reply

      It’s so true.
      I believe “E) who will look after me when I’m old and frail?” is the number one reason in my culture.

  2. Anonymous 06/10/2021 at - Reply

    I came in here because my partner wants to have children and I don’t. He ran out of arguments to convince me, so I’m rummaging through the internet. Again, nothing sounds good to me.
    1) Many people see cuddling and play. I see a pile of laundry, exhaustion, crying … Currently, for about a year I have been in a state of sleep deprivation, I am exhausted and I do not know how you can want to bring this state to yourself voluntarily and with enthusiasm.
    2) I am a woman, in my country the child is given the surname of the father. I have never attached much importance to it.
    3) I think that I would be a bad mother and my ward would only bring worse conditions to the world. I get irritated too easily (fatigue only makes this problem worse).
    4) My life doesn’t have to matter to the world. My life should matter first and foremost to me and I don’t see how a child could enrich it.
    5) and 6) A dog would be better. And it does not speak back.
    7) A baby won’t make me more complete. I like my life as it is.
    8) I am afraid of repeating my parents’ mistakes – just like my mother, I take on too many responsibilities because they kept telling me that “a girl has to do more”. I feel that I will not be able to work, raise children and run the house at the same time. I have no one to ask for help.
    9) If I want to experience something exciting, I go to the amusement park and get on a roller coaster.
    10) I am not ashamed to buy toys for myself, I am not ashamed to go to the cinema for a children’s movie. Why do I need a little drooling excuse?

  3. Dawson 05/21/2018 at - Reply

    I started realizing I want children about a year ago. I always liked the idea of it, but it became something imperative for me only recently. I have little daydreams about teaching my future child about the world, showing them how nature works, watching them explore and ask questions and learn how to answer them. But now, in my late 20s, it’s become more about being closer to my deceased mother and experiencing what she experienced with my brother and I. I want my dad to have grandchildren, and I want to show my child everything I got to experience and more.

    • Sanoj 11/05/2023 at - Reply

      It’s simple. I don’t want kids, because I want quality of life including travel, leisure time, enjoy company of friends and family who also have no kids, etc. Most reasons to have kids are shelfish and immature…

  4. Courtney 04/06/2018 at - Reply

    I want to have children in the near future so I can have someone to always be there when I am old and frail, and so I can love, protect them and teach them how to become world leaders.

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