While women see their fertility declining rapidly from the age of 35, many men can continue to conceive well into their 50s, or even later (despite the fact that their fertility also decreases with age). Unlike men, women therefore have a limited timeframe in which to start their family.
Some women simply can’t ignore the notion that their biological clock is ticking their time to have a child away. As a result, they make the choice to become a mom before it’s too late, even though this means conceiving without the male partner’s consent. Some of these women are involved with men who don’t want to have a child (or in some cases, another child), whereas they themselves are craving for a baby. Other women however, just want to surprise their long-term partner with the happy news of a new addition to the family.
Those who are single and who desperately want to become a mother can decide to have a child alone, for example, by having sex with a man on a one-night stand. Others simply want to raise their child without a man and therefore choose to keep the news of their pregnancy secret.
The desire to have a baby can be very powerful and can grow even stronger as the years go by. Sometimes, women are ready to do anything they can to finally fulfill their dream of becoming a mom.
Stop your contraception
There are many different forms of contraception. You may take the pill, have an Intrauterine Device (IUD) or a contraceptive implant, use patches, a diaphragm with spermicide or condoms. Whatever the contraceptive, stopping your birth control is the first thing to do if you are trying to conceive.
However, it’s vital to note that by having unprotected sex you are putting yourself and your future baby at risk of contracting sexually transmitted diseases (STD), especially if you are sleeping with men that you do not know.
Find out when you’re ovulating
In addition to having a healthy lifestyle, you also need to find out your ovulation date to know when to have sex and, therefore, to improve your chances of conceiving.
During ovulation, your ovaries release one or more eggs into the fallopian tubes. If sexual intercourse occurs at the right time, the egg may be successfully fertilized by sperm. The fertile window is small however, as the egg only survives between 12-24 hours when it is unfertilized. On average, women may be able to conceive for up to six days per cycle. Additionally, sperm can survive for up to 7 days in a woman’s body. To improve your chances of pregnancy, have sex two days before your ovulation and then again three or four days later.
There are several ways to know when your most fertile window is. One is to track your basal body temperature with a thermometer every morning when you wake up (before you eat, drink or have sex). Another way to find out when you are ovulating is to use ovulation predictor kits. You can purchase them online, in a supermarket or drug store. They are usually placed next to the pregnancy tests. Urine kits test for an increase in luteinizing hormone (LH), which occurs one or two days before ovulation. You can also inspect your cervical mucus to find out when you are ovulating.
Knowing when you are ovulating in advance will allow you to plan and prepare to have sex at the right moment, whether this is with your partner or with a one-night stand.
What are the legal rights of the father towards the child?
Before you decide to become pregnant without a man knowing, it’s important to be aware of the rights of the biological father.
If you’re married to your partner, then they will automatically be recognized as the father of your baby. However, if you are not married and don’t list the name of the biological father on the birth certificate, they won’t have any legal rights towards the child (custody, visitations or child support).
If the man acknowledges that he is the biological father of the child, but he is not listed on the birth certificate, he can try to obtain legal rights by establishing his paternity. To do so, he may sign an affidavit of paternity, which is a legal form used to establish parental rights and responsibilities towards the biological child. However, the paper needs to be signed by both parents. If the mother refuses to sign the paternity affidavit, the father can ask for a DNA test to establish paternity.
If paternity has been established, then the father will have rights towards the child, including visitation and custody. If the mother denies these rights, the father can obtain order visitation or parenting time from the court. If the mother doesn’t follow the new rules ordered by the court, she may have sanctions imposed upon her.
If you need more information regarding the legal rights of the father, as well as your own, don’t hesitate to seek legal advice from a solicitor.